San Francisco may very well be a world-class city; one of the most desirable places to live and the
‘Crown Jewel of California,’ but it sucks to have to “date” here.
The Top Three Reasons:
#1. Sunny California is a PR Hoax
In June, July, and August, you pull on your heavy coat, muffler, gloves and boots. The groaning foghorns haunt the early morning air – keening. And warning you about the weather of the day: thick, wet, gray, and fog – again. Your hair will be a mess. Curly hair goes “all frizz.” (Tip: BART over to sunny Berkeley and shop at the mind blowing Berkeley Hats for a warm summer chapeau.)
Don’t even try meeting on Nob Hill in the summer months- be prepared for whipping winds and freezing fog as you cross the street from the Big Four, or the Fairmont’s Tonga Room to the Top of the Mark. The wind tunnel as you leave The Clift Hotel wind tunnel is equally as egregious.
All your friends in San Rafael, Walnut Creek, and Burlingame are wearing sexy sundresses and your enshrouded layers of wool and fleece. The message: -flee the City!
2. The Traffic
So maybe you ride your bike to work from the There- is-no sun-in-the-Sunset District. (Another ancient marketing hoax)
However, you loathe the “Wiggle Room” bike path on Oak Street where multiple copies of show-off Henry Ego swoosh by- with nary a “on your right.”
You see a bike accident every day and decide to go ’public transportation.’
Have you ever taken the 38 Geary at 6 PM to get downtown? Be prepared for a plethora of winos, derelicts, and bizarre del mundos, and, no, they will not give a seat to a lady. There you are teetering on your Manolo’s, wrapped in a scarf, heavy coat, a warm hat – (from Berkeley Hats) gloves and you notice the inmates are running the Asylum.
So, taxicabs are the answer-and they aren’t cheap (I do love LYFT…DeSoto cabs and Flywheel.com)
3. Perfectly Putrid Parking
If you drive, you know parking costs are astronomical and parking tickets are like snowflakes in the East. They’re everywhere. Armies of rabid meter maids circle the Marina, Union Street, Union Square and SOMA – shooting tickets with great speed and alacrity from their ticket guns- earning that over $90 million revenue in parking tickets for the City.
A First Date Tale
In June, Jill from Brisbane agreed to meet Michael R. at the Burger Bar atop Macy’s On Union Square. It was a “first date” therefore, special.
No one told her it was prom night, free-movie on Union Square night, and the Apple convention. As she blithely approached the City, the traffic came to a grinding halt. She turned to KCBS 740 AM for the traffic: Nightmare on 101. Too late to try Highway 280.
She sat seething – for one hour- then was advised by her date- he checked – every parking lot around Union Square was ‘full.’ He suggested they meet in Brisbane- free parking, no fuss, and no muss. She liked him already.
Bridge and Tunnelers swarm into the City on weekends. They come wide-eyed and optimistic. They leave – with pockets empty, parking anger on “high” and fed up with the traffic. Big Buzz kill.
Backup on the Golden Gate Bridge and the Bay Bridge can be catastrophic.
So there you have it.
The weather sucks, parking is ephemeral, and traffic is like sludge. Other than that, San Francisco rocks!