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Archive for the category “Page Larkin Date guide”

Puffy Daddy and the Blonde

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I was way too early for an appointment.

I had time to kill, so I watched this much younger blonde try to pick up an older, puffy guy with the bad dye job and fake tan.

Sitting at the window, I watched as he pulled up to the restaurant in the big red Maserati and walk into the cafe like he owned the joint.

He spotted her across the room- she threw him a big wave (here I am!) He had a swagger in his stride. He plopped into the chair.  She was beaming. They appeared to exchange pleasantries. This girl was dripping with sugar. He snapped his fingers for the waiter. The kid behind the counter, looked perplexed and walked over. Imperiously, he ordered Fish-o-filet. The kid said he could have a tuna sandwich. The man ordered, “a chocolate milkshake – shaken not stirred.” Really? 

She actually glowed as she watched him. Her posture changed and she leaned in and seemed to hang on his every word. He was cavalier- talked loudly and was very animated. He gave off an aura of who gives a damn.

Curious, I walk by the couple on the way to the loo and heard her say, “You are so powerful.”

“Yes, I am,” he agreed.

Schlock and Awe

On my way back.  I stopped near the couple to study the Hardly Strictly Bluegrass poster on the wall.

She was hughly fawning all over Puffy Daddy with the Howdy Doody hair. She had crossed and uncrossed her legs several times since I started nonchalantly peering.

The Love Fest continued and I overheard her say, “We’ve always been friendly.” He agreed.

Mr. Bluster and Miss Sleep to the Top? 

I slipped into a chair nearby and pretended to tie my shoe- I didn’t think they would notice I was wearing clogs.

He said “Hey, Babe, what’s your real name?”

She said her father, a doctor in Alabama, wanted to call her OB GYN and her mother changed it to Meg GYN

She bragged she was a rebellious teenager and that   she dropped a “g.”

“That’s what I thought’” he said.

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Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition, my appointment arrived and we had a lot to talk about.

 

I met John Miller on Millionaire Match.com

photo_21517_20120317-2I met ‘John Miller’ on Millionaire Match.com

Years ago, I joined MillionaireMatch when friends encouraged me to take a risk. They thought it would be hysterical to try this site. It was.

I posted the requisite three photos, listed my likes and filled out the silly questionnaire and sat back and waited for floods of moneymakers to show up.

Rather than a flood, I had a trickle of flirtations.

The first man to contact me was, John Miller, a real New Yorker. He had that brusque, Bronxy, braggadocio style.

His first e-mail to me was “Hey! Baby!”

I failed to be impressed and deleted it. A day later, John Miller wrote again, this time he used words and indicated he was in Public Relations was “tremendously well off financially” and also worked in real estate.

Curious, I asked him about his experience with online dating.

He wrote that he didn’t really need dates. He said actresses and movie stars were often after him and he’d been ‘doing very well in every way’ since getting divorced, months earlier.

I then asked about his friends and he bragged that the “radio star” Howard Stern was a good friend. Ugh.

Interestingly enough, he never once he asked me a single question.

He was quite forthcoming with information and said he never dated a woman who was “a dog or a slob.” He also offered that he ‘greatly respected women.’ Really?

In a very weak moment, I agreed to speak with him on the phone.

He spoke the same way he wrote… that New York cadence – however, he was more cocky and arrogant than I ever anticipated.

John Miller  said he dated a parade of models but he thought that a California girl with a couple of degrees from those big West Coast schools would be impressive. I mentioned I was very busy working on a large project, hiring a team of executives. He said he’d be perfect for the job- any job- he was that talented.

He wanted to fly me out to the East Coast so we could get to know one another better.

Not only was I hesitant, I was disinterested. In no time, he dropped down into classic crude and lewd references. Next!

As I said goodbye to John Miller, he protested and asked if didn’t want to hire him to be one of my executives. Lewd references followed.

Hire him?

You’re fired!

 

South

Tom Hanks – I’ve got a crush on you – be my hologram

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I slogged through most of the book on tape,  A Hologram for the King,  and retuned it to the library. Next!

However, I saw the Trailer for the film, starring Tom Hanks and was sold!  I dashed over to the theater. For all intents and purposes, the theater was filled with single women.

As a rule, all women love Everyman, Tom Hanks. He is cute funny, glib, like the (we wish) The man next door ( san wife. )  We loved him in so many movies – see here

Throughout the film,  we laughed, we swooned, we felt  his pain and and were delighted when he skipped the harlot and fell in love with – well, you’ll see.

Go see A Hologram for the King

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‘Worst of the Week’ dating sites?

Two Scams- to tawdry for words?

Suddenly Single... Minded

Two Online Dating Sites to Avoid aka  The “Two Worst of the Week” Dating sites.

One is so bad – you have to laugh, the second is all about fabulous, world-wide, glamorous traveling for free. No, really.

Caveat Emptor: Scams, swindles and grifters are very prevalent on dating sites.indexmonyeeeeee

Who Wants to be a Millionaire?

A cursory glance at the MillionaireMatch (MM) website tells all.

Claiming to be the place: “Where all the pro pro-athletes, rich – yet- busy – doctors and all the  very successful CEOs go for…” Romance and Relationship and it is  “... easy for the millionaires, whose busy lifestyle leaves little time to meet people conventionally, to find ideal partners online.” Who knew? 

Just How Much is a Million Dollars in 2016?

For the record- A Millionaire on MM is defined by anyone making approximately, about, around $150,000. Or less.

And, yes, for $39 a…

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Oh, boy! There are boys in San Francisco – uh oh!

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Person connecting and sharing using social media networks

San Francisco: No Country for Old Men?

Fact: Floods of People of Color are exiting San Francisco at an alarming rate.

Fact: Scores of men from TagFut are moving to the City to pay $3000+ rents.

Run! TAGFUT* is here!  (*Twitter, Apple, Google, Facebook, Uber, Tesla)

Who are these men coming to San Francisco in droves ? Could this be like the 1848 Gold Rush where the streets of San Francisco were lined with randy, party loving, dancing, prancing men with gold in their pockets?

Er, not so much.  The gold in their pockets, yes.

The sad story about the population of locals evaporating and explosion of TagFut Males Techies (Single, Asian/ White, under 35)  moving in-  creates ire. Millennials who grew up in San Francisco resent the fact that they cannot rent in the City,  that their  favorite bars, restaurants, and cafés are taken over by these pseudo-hipsters who have a lot more dinero than they do. And, the girls aren’t happy either!

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 Sure, there is a  trickle of  female techies-  who bemoan the fact  that these nerdy guys with a whole lotta money, don’t know from flirting and are totally lacking in social savvy.  Hence, their predilection for Yelping every restaurant, bar  and cleaners in San Francisco.  A  girls got to do, what a girls got a do.

Yelp couldn’t be happier.

The best analysis of the Travesty Techies taking over the city is found here See: Priceonomics

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Where do you find a manly man? An intelligent guy with some humor, wit, panache and manners? Looking for a great guy who is both kind and sensitive enough to be able to ‘read’ you and smart enough to ‘get’ you? It is part luck and part serendipity.

Be open and you could meet the love of your life. It happens

Catch his eye – catch his heart: Look up, look around, smile more, say ‘hey’ more often. Just do it: sign up for  a free 7-day trial on an online Dating site. Get off the couch, push away from the computer and go outside and play.

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“I love the man that can smile in trouble, that can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection. ‘Tis the business of little minds to shrink, but he whose heart is firm, and whose conscience approves his conduct, will pursue his principles unto death.”      

Thomas Paine

Diverse

Where are all the guys in San Francisco?

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Donde esta los muchachos?

Dear Page Larkin

I went to the movie Friday afternoon and the room was filled with women. No, it wasn’t a chick flick. It was Batman vs Superman Then, I went to a Pinot Noir wine tasting at Whole Foods. We were 75% single women and 25% couples.

Rick’s Wine Bar looks like a sorority party. I can’t bring myself to attend NASCAR or cigar bars.

Where are all the boys?

I went to a trendy, cool, church-nope, all gray-haired ladies – pretty much.

Then I went to Bed Bath and Beyond on Sunday – it was like a wedding shower- the aisles were filled with women, girls, ladies, shopping for linens and things.

Is it me, or is it San Francisco? This is like living in the world of the Amazons.

By mistake, I went to Union Street.  Really popular Singles Bars used to be the rage -way back when . It was packed with 20 to 30-year-old, drunk, Rrat boys high-fiving one another and measuring virility/maturity by the number of sake bombs they were throwing back.

Where are the big boys?

I went to Valencia Street- and was inundated with couples going to all the trendy- fabulous-darling restaurants. The Good Vibrations emporium was teeming with women, go figure.

Where did all the single guys go?

From Fresno to Frisco and Frustrated

 

Dear From Fresno to Frisco…

Brava! You have done due diligence and make keen observations.

A guy has got to eat – linger in the aisles at Safeway, Trader Joe’s, Whole Foods, and Rainbow  Grocery-you get the idea. Smile. Say “hey.”

Many happy women say they met many happy men at the Golden State Warrior and SF Giants games – the perfect recipe for meeting people of the opposite sex: winning teams, sky high excitement, mutual passion for Pence, Posey, Pagan….Curry, Klay….

You’re right, guys are not in bookstores, yoga classes, or cake decorating classes – they should be – that’s where women go.

 

Tip of the day: See Top 10 Places Meet Men 

 

Breakfast

“There is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.”

Steven Wright

 

 

 

Happy Mothers…happy day…memories

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“A mother’s happiness is like a beacon,

lighting up the future

but reflected also on the past

in the guise of fond memories.”

Honore de Balzac

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Thanks for the memories

San Francisco dates: Uber Lyfts and Critical Mass

Dear Page Larkin- Dating Questions and Quandaries

Suddenly Single... Minded

86c6d473f7731b47c906d7286f46417dDear Page Larkin,

I fell hard and fast for a woman I met on OKCupid. She’s the polar opposite of my “ideal woman.” I will admit I’m a Kardashian fan- and that is my “goal girl.” All of a sudden I am with a short, perky, redhead who thinks I’m “all that.” What do you think?

Head in the clouds

Dear Head in the clouds,

I think you’re very lucky to meet a woman who thinks you’re “all that.”

Peace and Love, Page

dead-end-777__180Dear Page,

I met a guy for a drink and he arrived on his bicycle  and was likable. We had a few things in common and were both comfortable with one another. We agreed to meet Saturday at the Disney Museum.  Friday night, I saw him on the TV news- he was the star the Critical Mass fiasco- he was hitting a car with his helmet. It was…

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The Irony Board of Life?

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As he shaved that morning, his mind was racing.

This is it – the showdown. He had been waiting for this day. He felt confident, cocky. He knew he may have lost the battle, but he would win the war.

He sneered as he thought about her. He would show her. She would be lucky to get out alive. He stared his reflection. He would show her.

Today at nine o’clock the two of them would be sitting  in the courtroom, in front of Judge Mare Swayback – the most vilified judge in town. Ironically, 20-plus years earlier, they had been sitting with Marge McClure, the most sought after wedding planner in the city.

She had  moved out six months earlier. He was happy – relieved – to get rid of her. He didn’t need her.

She complained-was always complaining. She hated his cigars, his drinking, the flirting and his driving. She was a control freak and cooked those horrible meals. They were so damn healthy, they made him sick.

The kids were launched, gone, and had jobs. The nest had been empty for three months before she started laying the groundwork. Bam! They were in couple’s therapy. Whatever.

 Two meetings into it, he knew something was up.

He got blindsided. He thought the old empty nest was “The subject du jour.” Lo and behold, she’s babbling and dabbing her eyes, her nose running and she’s talking about his drinking, his DUI’s, the trysts, the money. Like a faucet of all the things he did wrong.

He sat there stunned. After 20 minutes, she said four words he never in a million years thought he would hear, “I want a divorce.”

The room was deathly quiet. He could barely breathe. The room felt warm. There was an underwater quality. He was speechless.

She waited for several minutes. He said, “Good. You can live alone.”

She smiled at the therapist, shook her head,  and walked out of the office – happier than she had been in years.

That afternoon, he called his shark attorney. She had handled his DUI – she would get him out of this.

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Abandoned

Computer Dating: Hearts or Solitaire? Your deal

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Once Upon a time, in 1966, the rage was a new trend called “Computer Dating”
.

Boxes of colored IBM punch cards and computers the size of a Volkswagen Bug

were de rigueur.

‘Matchmakers’ were considered old fashioned and passé. Having “Hal” the computer, do the work was the hot, new way to get boys and girls together. It was groovy and neat. Need a date for a hootenanny?


“Thousands of boys and girls who’ve never met plan weekends together, for now that punch-card dating’s here, can flings be far behind? And oh, it’s so right, baby. The Great God Computer has sent the word. Fate. Destiny. Go-go-go.”— Look Magazine, February 1966


Picky, Picky, Picky: Online dating peccadilloes

So what has changed since the thrilling 1960’s?  Today, there are dozens of studies analyzing every aspect of online dating, comparisons of dating sites, and coping with being Suddenly Single.   Analysis done at UC Berkeley indicates that when it come to on line dating.  women tend to be much pickier than men. Interesting.  It also sounds like the girls are a lot less flexible in their ‘Preferences’ for age and ethnicity than the boys.  Perhaps more girls are still subscribing to that old hunter-gatherer syndrome: Men hunt – Women wait to be contacted?

What’s up with that? Bon vivant, Johnny in Los Gatos says ‘It’s all a numbers game. And, you’ve got to get in the game or you don’t get to play.” Game on!

By the see – by the see

Evidence also states that men involved in Online Dating, cast a wider net than women.  Guys generally have very few limits, or restrictions, when they are looking for their potential dates. As a rule, guys tend to contact more women – more often. Men are consistently labeled as being ‘visual’.  

Some guys  get  “virtual whiplash” from all the speedy scanning  photographs of women on Match.com.

FACT: For men it is are all about pictures.

 Dating guru, Dr Diana Kirschner, author of the best selling, Love in 90 Days, encourages women to register on, at least, two dating sites and to make the date quest a daily priority.   Bottom line? Lighten up, enjoy the game and make friends. Be careful out there.

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