Suddenly Single… Minded

Welcome to the Wild and Whimsical World of Internet Dating

Archive for the category “50 and Single”

Russians meddling in dating site?


The Money behind the very popular Bumble Dating Site comes from Russia? Really?

#1. Badoo is owned by Russian multi-millionaire Andrey Andreev.

#2. Bumble, the very popular Online Dating Site is 79% owned by Badoo and therefore  controlled by the very  successful, powerful and secretive Russian Andrey Andreev.


Andreev has been trying for several years to enter the U.S. market’s complex and oversaturated online dating industry with the help of his social network Badoo, which has proven to be popular in Latin America and Europe…money

What price love? If Facebook just got hacked – a sneaky, stealthy Data Breach  by the Evil Russians…whats bumbling around this dating site?

Evil men have no songs.’ How is it that the Russians have songs?

Friedrich Nietzsche




Mr Right? Not right now

bad photos12

Harry decided to push the envleope and rock the online dating world.

After six years of posting that old photo – he decided, “What the hell?”

He concluded he would  get a lot more attention by posting interesting (aka bizarre) photos.

Week Number Two:


He garnered zero attention. Go figure.

Week Number Three:


Our pal, Harry, decided to bring out the big guns and Go Big!

His pals said he was crazy. Women rarely responded.

He kept up the charade for a month of rejection before he resorted to contacting me for sometough love and serious dating tips.

Here we go!

via Photo Challenge: Out of This World

Living alone and happy?

Happy together? Or ecstatic alone?

Are You part of the 40%?

A huge contingent of divorced men and women gleefully live alone: the kids are on their own, they may be “between marriages, flying solo” or dabbling at dating online. Perhaps you’re perfectly happy living alone, on your own, by yourself…

The Date Watchers- a robust and dynamic group of single women (some around 50-60),  include a potpourri of women in different stages of relationships. Two of the ladies are in romantic relationships, three are dating around and some are totally not interested in men or dating ever again. A cadre of  the Date Watchers  are “vicarious daters” who can’t wait to hear about the latest exploits of their socially inclined friends.

Women everywhere are intrigued by the concept of “The Golden Girls” – the once considered cutting-edge,  sitcom about four women – totally different from one another -living together under one roof  and  having fun in the same time.

PicMonkey Image-47

What do you think? Girls Rule or Room- Mates Never again?

Tell me:

Daddy’s little girl wakes up


Lucy sent an email to her four best friends- advising them they all had permission to loudly remind her  “He is not that into you” every time she started dating another dead-end dude.

She told the girls they had her approval to remind her, immediately, if I she ever started dating a loser.

Embarrassed, she admitted that she rationalized when Richard L. got moody and sullen she chalked it up to the pressure of his job at the University.  Later, when Gregory S.  was hostile and aggressive she sloughed it off and said he was just tired. The worst was Michael, whom all the girls hated because he treated Lucy so poorly: he didn’t show up for dates, he didn’t call her back, he obviously was cheating on her and, Lucy let him walk all over her.

Years of therapy had taught Lucy that her father, the dominating (yet suave and charming) playboy did a number on her. She aspired to be sweet and seductive and always ended up with all the wrong guys. Her friends organized intervention and told her to stopping a doormat. She listened and from that day forward, she changed and grew stronger a little bit every day


No one expects the doormat to stand upright, shake itself off, and amble down the street to seek its own happiness.

Lynn Coady



via Daily Prompt: Dominant

The missing email ruins everything?

You may have been have been “Lost in Space”…and didn’t even know it.

It happens.

In the wide, wonderful, world of online dating  e-mails, every once in awhile that very special pivotal electronic message gets lost in “Ether Space.”

It’s the Netherworld, that 10th Ring of Hell where, just like socks, e-mails go missing.

 What? Me, worry?

And, yes, dear- Online Dating Beginner… it has happened to you. You just didn’t realize it. What you considered to be a rejection or a rebuff,

in reality, may have simply been a “Triple E, an Ether Evaporated E-mail”.

Single in Sausalito, Rusty,  wrote Bernadette  a beautifully crafted, romantic poem of epic proportions in response to her invitation for a weekend in the Wine Country. For two days, she patiently perched near her computer waiting for this response. Nada. Zilch. Zero response.

Bernadette sadly concluded Rusty was ‘Not that into her.’

The longer she ruminated- the more she thought – “Heh! Perhaps he was a bit of cur and  the she concluded: “What a jerk. Next.”

Upon return from the weekend of swimming, wine tasting, tennis, chess, and charades with her friends, she checked her emails. There she finally discovered the most eloquent, poetic, e-mail from Rusty accepting her invitation.  Unfortunately, the long awaited e-mail was lost in the far recesses of Ether Space for several days before surfacing. It happens.


Erin  tells the story of meeting “The most wonderful man from Santa Fe” while waiting for a plane at Denver International. Due to “weather” and delayed flights, they spent 4 hours chatting, having coffee and being totally mesmerized with one another. They exchanged business cards and e-mail addrsses and reluctantly boarded planes to their respective homes.

She  knew she had met her soul mate. And then, she never heard from him again. She garnered  the courage and sent three  e-mails- in three weeks- and never heard a word back from her “potential soul mate.” Chalking it up to a “C’est la vie” event – she went on. Disappointed.

One year to the month later, she was in line at the MOMA and ‘Santa Fe guy’ walked up -looked at Erin and point blank asked “Why didn’t you respond to my e-mails?”  She asked him the same question.

Lost in Space…She is now Married Erin and living a happily ever after life

There is a new saying, “When in doubt: don’t Rescind the invitation, Resend”.


“We Need to Talk” the four scariest words known to man

Which four little words strike terror in the hearts of men?

The most virile, robust, brawny man can be instantly reduced to a quaking, quivering puddle of ‘uh-oh’ when he hears the infamous, “We need to talk.”

It’s Pavlovian.

Men hear “We need to talk ” and instantly break out in panic and alarm. Peter in Milpitas  said, “Everyman knows those four words are code for “You are in big trouble, buddy”

There are no visions of sugarplums dancing in guy’s heads.

It’s more like visions of: The Breaking-up Talk; “Weapons of Mass Discussion” and the inevitable “The Top 10 things you did wrong, dude”.

Men have said that hearing “The Four Words” is far more intimidating than hearing these four ~

  • · Pull the vehicle over
  • · Your grades came today
  • · Your boss is calling
  • · Test results are here
  • · We’re going Christmas shopping
  • · The kids found your_____

 Even a towering Tony Soprano type can be reduced to a blithering George Costanza upon hearing you say, “We need to talk”.   

So, ladies: use these Four Words with caution and discretion. All the great lovers in history had issues and peace talks.

Think of Bonnie and Clyde, Ozzie and Harriet, Bill and Hillary, Homer and Marge. Be judicious.

Tis the season to be jolly and… talk amongst yourselves.

Brilliant riposte: Dear Page Larkin- dating dilemmas

Dear Page Larkin,

When Kath and I started dating, ((she’s 65, I’m 70) she was romantic and spontaneous. Four years later, she is less available. My job is the resason: we only see each other on weekends due to distance and driving. She claims she’s tired of the driving. I call the 18 miles from my house to her apartment “Our 18-mile Hallway.” She used to think that was romantic. Now, she wants to move into my house. I cherish my man-cave and don’t wish a full-time roommate.

Henry VIII

Dear Henry VIII

Dude, Fish or cut bait. Kath’s lack of luster may be in direct proportion to your unwillingness to take it up a notch. I imagine, at 65 she may be planning for the future and thinking your interest is waning with your dead end weekend-only arrangements.

Peace, Page

Dear Page,

I met a great guy online (retired SF Fireman, divorced thrice.) We took it very slow. We have both been hurt and have six adult kids between us. Our on-and-off again relationship took a turn for the better after he received an inheritance and could pay off all his debts. Flush, he moved in with me, redecorated my kitchen, the master bath, and transferred my pathetic garden to Sunset magazine cover. Then, much to my dismay, he got bored and started playing golf with the boys and having drinks.

My home is beautiful and empty. And, he has virtually disappeared. My friends say,  “Toss the bum out.”  I ’m thinking about going online just to look for other single men. Good idea?

Sunset Years need Sunshine

Dear Sunset Years

Close one door before you open another. Talk to the Lukewarm Fireman and tell him your feelings about six-hour golf games and drinks, thereafter.  Do you miss him? Tell him. This is your call:  decide iif you want to be a classic ‘Golf Widow’ or “In the Game?”

Carpe diem, Page

Page Larkin,

I just met George on a dating site. He is great guy by all accounts, except for one. While he says he’s divorced, he still lives with his Ex and may share the same bed.  He says it’s a very small apartment and a foldout bed in the living room is lumpy.  Should I be worried?

Besty of No Bed Bugs

Dear Betsy of No Bed-bugs

Hmm, where else could Johnny possibly sleep? Think: a cot, an air mattress, the couch, in Air B&B, a guestroom, a sleeping bag.  I would say Johnny lacks initiative and you should lack interest. Move on, girlfriend. You can do better.

Moving on,  Page

Ms. Larkin,

My randy and retired neighbor, Stan, trolls Craigslist every day in hopes of a “Nooner.”  I know his wife is a nurse – she works a classic 12-hour shift- and he invites women into his house for casual sex.  How do I know this? He told me. Should I tell his wife?

Good neighbor Sherry

Dear Good neighbor Sherry

This is classic: NOYB.  While you think you would be helping – this is none of your business.   Pay attention to your own wife, life and commitments.

Peace, Page

Hello, Page,

Since when did everyone start kissing and holding hands on the first date? I met three different men, three different nights,  for drinks downtown last week. After the second drink, they all became very lovey-dovey. I wasn’t feeling it. Am I out to lunch? 


Hello, ShampainCocktails,

You might consider trying “daytime dates” involving coffee – not cocktails – in clean well-lighted places. Let me know if you don’t experience a 100% change in attitudes and platitudes

Peace and love,Page

Dear Ms. Larkin,

My dad, “56,” has been divorced and single for 20 years.  He just announced that he wants to get married again.  He has turned into a dating machine. He goes out with a different woman three nights a week. The money he spends on dinners, drinks and flowers, etc. could buy me a condo.

He left his computer on and I looked at his dating profile. He claims to be  46, a runner, a movie buff, and a gym rat. He is not seen a gym or run a mile since high school. Shall I tell him to smarten up?

Peggy in Pleasant Hill

Dear Peggy,

NOYB:  What your dear old dad does is none of your business.  And, you are snooping and sneaky to read his private material. I’m sure you’d expect the same respect. Wish your Dad well-  it’s his romantic research. Not yours.

Peace, Page

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.  Mark Twain



Date Bait: Want to hook a honey for Christmas? Best on

Patty W. lives in Pasadena and was single/again for two years befor she signed up for

In a flight of fancy, she filled out the online dating questionaire and in a short while,( read: one week)  she met the Love of Her Life. Yes, Binkie, it happens.

Patty in Pasadena

Hi. I am happy and positive, sensual, physically fit, passionate about life and very self-assured. Friends describe me as open, thoughtful and caring with an empathy for others.

You want and truly value a partner who is loyal and can be there for you, in all ways, and support your needs as well as your own. 
You’re active, attractive, eager to explore, intellectually curious and like to play. 
You have a busy and engaged life you love, but want a partner and best friend to share the highs and the lows with, and to grow together. You love to touch and be touched, and desire the emotional and physical intimacy that you know in your heart is truly possible. 
My “dream partner” and best friend is family-oriented, smiles a lot and is up for the adventure of life–comfortable with spontaneous (and perhaps even crazy) spur-of-the-moment trips both near to home and far away, when that is possible with our mutually busy schedules. 
 That week,  Patty had a dozen winks and few one-line notes from guys  and a sweet note from Gary in Oxnard. His note led to a lengthy, entertaining, phone call, a coffee date which lasted three hours and involved a long walk- replete with lively conversation and a connection.
That was a year ago. The two are making “Future Plans” and are forever indebted to miraculous


A Tale of 2 Hustlers – San Francisco Seniors beware

Widows Peek?

Peter (60) is a self-proclaimed  man-about-town and bachelor.

He is on the lookout for San Francisco widows (live alone) from Pacific Heights, St. Francis Wood or Nob Hill.  Women must be 65 or older. He professes that he loves older women.  He has one suit, a navy blue blazer, a pair of gray slacks and a few vintage Countess Mara neckties from Goodwill.

On a first date, he wears one of his two uniforms, sports a fake Movado watch and has last month’s Economist or Wall Street Journal tucked under his arm.

Peter, no slouch, has studied etiquette, is charming, and makes a very good first impression. He presents himself as an entrepreneur and a bon vivant. He can dance around all incisive questions and flatter a woman until she blushes and believes the subtle stream of compliments coming her way.

He’s the kind of man who kisses a woman’s hand and gazes into her eyes. He alludes to romantic trips to Paris, Turks and Caicos, moonlight, massages and Dom Perignon.

Clever boy that he is, he has a well thought out, tightly scripted autobiography – with references to prepping,  a short-lived Ivy League education,  travel, fame and acclaim. Naturally, he reports he is retired and merely managing his money.

To Tell the Truth?

Peter lives with four roommates in the Sunset District. He calls himself an entrepreneur (which translates to “lightly employed”) and darn, he forgets his wallet quite frequently.

He gushes well-rehearsed apologies – followed up by more compliments. An accomplished house painter; you can find Peter on a ladder with a brush in hand when he’s not wooing his most recent target.

Some women see through the carefully crafted persona, the thin veil of charm and ask hard questions and dismiss Peter – others succumb to his charms, for a while.

Buyer beware.

On the Web: Black Widow?

Channel, 55, seeks out men who are 70 to 80, widowed, lonely, not adroit at online dating, and live in the right zip code. She has her own well-honed algorithm.

She has been trawling Seniors Meet, JDate,, Craigslist, Sugar Daddy, and MillionaireMatch the last 10 years.

Vivacious and flirtatious, she has dated dozens of men once or twice; others she has been with for months. Recently, she came very close to marrying a man  25 years her senior. He was 80, from Burlingame, a retired executive with real estate holdings all over the Peninsula and a condo in Maui. After much ‘encouragement’ from Channel, he bought her a four-carat ring from Tiffanys.  As fate would have it, shortly thereafter, he had a stroke and a heart attack and, bam! He was gone. Just as quickly, his three daughters closed ranks, labeled Channel a ‘gold digger’ and slammed the door in her face.


That little hiccup didn’t slow Channel down. She was out and about days later. She sold the ring, picked up a knock-off at Macy’s, picked up a new St John Knit, and now passes herself off as “a recent widow.”

She has her eye on the glitzy San Francisco retirement community, the San Francisco Towers, and The Sequoias as two hot potential places to meet her new man.

 “Was ever book containing such vile matter

So fairly bound? O, that deceit should dwell

In such a gorgeous palace!


 How do you protect yourself from scoundrels and sneaks?

Ask questions.

Talk on the phone – a lot- before you commit to meeting anyone.

What to Take on a First Date:

1. Identification
2. Cell phone
3. Money for a taxi
4. Keys
5. Phone number of ‘contact’ person’

Get Smart

There are certain logical guidelines for an initial meeting. Always trust your intuition. You know when something is not right. Don’t bring valuables. It’s a coffee date – not show and tell. (Leave the jewelry and credit cards at home)

If you are feeling strangely uncomfortable with the person –not just nervous- excuse yourself. It happens. If you feel compelled to provide an explanation, say you have to make a phone call, have to move your car, or meet a friend or get to work.

Buyer Beware – Always.



Wear Mistletoe, smile more and flirt more

Your Merry Mantra:

Play hard and work soft

Yes, Virginia, tis the season to be flirting.

In my small rural hometown, most people say ‘Hello,’ and ‘Good morning,’ and ‘Hey’ as they get to work and play in the morning. Actual Eye contact is involved.

People wave and nod to one another. Men and women both hold the door for one another. You hear the word “Thanks,” a lot.

I want to hold your hand. Please.

I think there’s more hand-holding in that small town, per capita, than there is in all of San Francisco. They say in San Francisco there’s more emphasis placed on career success, than (sit down; drink optional) relationship success. What’s up with that?

No, Virginia, this more convivial behavior is not Amish, Quaker or Mormon. It’s just another mindset. Maybe it’s a throwback to the 1950’s.

It is very Mid-West.


San Francisco needs more smiling, flirting, and mistletoe

Why do you suppose merely “Being friendly” is so foreign in San Francisco?

After a week of this time-travel-world, I recently returned to the City. As my luggage came off the carousel, I was forced back onto the merry-go-round of San Francisco, where we go so fast, we miss meeting one another.

Slow down, put that phone down and smile at someone! Now.

We’re texting, Twittering, we’re Linkedn, clicking away on Instagram and Snapchat and were on Facebook, and on variations of We belong to social clubs, gyms, book clubs, bike clubs, chess clubs or teams of some sort. Really, it is still like two ships passing in the aisle at Bryan’s, Safeway or Trader Joe’s.

Hello! Hi! Hey! Over here!

Did you ever think that just as you’re going out the side door of the store- with exactly the same carefully selected food items in your recyclable bag – that your doppelganger is about to buy the same carefully selected items? And, she or he, too, will walk out, alone, with their recyclable bags?

Did we both just work out, see the same film, and go out to dinner with single friends? What are the chances we run, hike, ride, walk, stroll, or spelunk in the exact same location, at different times?

The Playground of Life

Whether you are on a merry-go-round, a slide, or a teeter-totter, you have to admit: it a bizarre time to be at the Singles Playground.

I’ll go out on a limb- unless the ground rules change to involve more people saying ‘Hey’ ‘Hello’ and ‘Good morning’, we will all be living single, solitary, parallel lives.

So close and yet, so far away.

NotJust for Christmas

Now is the Time to Flirt and Have Happy Holidays

If ever there was a time to be jolly and bright – now is the time.

Starting today: smile and say “hey” to five people (read: persons of the opposite sex sans wedding ring). Repeat. Daily. Speak to people in line at the store, on MUNI, in a cafe.

Resolve to have fun this holiday season, start today.indexmistellletoeoeoe

Get mistletoe – wear it on your lapel, on your hat- and hang it over every door you can …

I say play hard and work soft. Flirt often and carry a big smile.

Say hey, hey, hey at: Page.Larkin@gmail.comchristmabulb frame__180

Post Navigation