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Archive for the category “50 and Single”

Dating 101:Can you meet your soul mate on Yelp?

dice-161376__180 Q. Do you Yelp?

 A. Only If I am pinched!

Can you meet your soul mate on Yelp?

Dear Page,

I am 43, single again and decided to start over – and date younger women. I went online – decided to look for women on Yelp. I am a big Yelp Review Dude. In three months, I have dated six much younger women – all dead ends.

First, I met Danniey – she said she was “26 and a restaurant critic.” Curious, I asked her where she had recently dined she sent me her three recent reviews. This is “whot she wrote”

Too Fat: This place is by far the worst burger place I have went to.

Coming into Fat Burger, three people greeted us. I thought that was so sweet of them. Not a lot of burger joints will greet you that way. Anyways, it took my friend and I a while to figure out what we want. They go by weight of the meat and you have options of toppings to put on your burger

My friend and I got the same meal! Which was the 1/3 burger. The only difference between our food was that I got curly fries and he got skinny fries.

Fowl Play: Once before I got fried chicken with their tartar sauce with sides of rice and potato salad. My food came out and it looked delicious. In my opinion, the portion of the chicken were so big that it was really filling. I enjoyed the potato salad on the side.

It was my friend’s birthday and we decided to drink before we decided to go to this place. It was a little after 10:30pm when we ordered and my friends and I were super hungry. To be honest, I don’t remember being too loud but according to one of the workers there, we were being “way too loud” The owner says,”We’re closed, the kitchen is closed.” Apparently she was trying to kick us out. We will not go back. Ever.

We went to Fishermans Grotto in Frisco – very high class. Really good place to have clam chowder when you are near the Pier. They had two types of clam chowder (Boston and I forgot what the other one was called.) Both served in a bread bowl of desired. I also ordered calamari. It was good but not the best I have had. The place was really fancy and high classed.

On the phone, – she is a sweet girl. I was thinking Eliza Dolittle – then, decided against it.

Next was Shenikqua –  29, divorced, outgoing, friendly and lives in the Mission. Her Yelp handle is “On  a mission.” We spoke on the phone – she really wanted me to go her nail salon with her. She sent me her Yelp review – and this is what she wrote:

Darn, be pretty is taking too much of my time. Me like this nail salon. Gentlemen are welcome too.. I’ve seen several men came in to get their mani, pedi ( without painting ) & also facial treatments..;). You guys will be treated like a King, lol .. Heaven isn’t far away !!

I use to double my happiness by grabbing an Ice Sea Salt Coffee from 85 Bakery ( it was in the same plaza ) and enjoy my Queen’s time …Highly recommend this salon !! Life is short .. Just reward yourself with some simple pleasures …We never know what’s going to happen tomorrow, right ?!!

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I knew from the start we probably might not be a fit. Her Nail salon date and review blew me away.

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Then I met Kellie aka “Missy Food Xpert” in San Mateo. She, too, was happy to send me her review of a good restaurant for a first date.

The Fry House

The combination of meat, salad & sauce were delicious and tasty. I can’t help myself when I saw the chili hot sauce, adding on the spice always make it better for me. Be careful if you’re not into spicy side because this sauce is Smocking Hot..

This place is new, clean and fun decorations. There’s tables for dine in but with quite a bit amount of customers it will be hard for a big group or family.

Page, Yelp is not the place to meet single women. I struck out. Any ideas?

New in Town and Searching

Dear New In Town,

You get Gold Stars for trying! First: Date your own decade. Next, look at this: Get Your Mojo Moving. Try those Top 5 tips and let me know how that works for you.

Peace, Page Larkin

Matchmakers: you get what you pay for – really?

 

How much is that date?

TV celebrity, Millionaire Matchmaker, Patti Stanger is still like a house on fire: noisy, loud, alarming, hot and gets a lot of attention.

She is not an elegant, professional woman.

On the first season of her TV show, often self-described as “wildly successful.” Stanger wasn’t as crass or as shrill. Someone must have advised her to emulate the style of the Real Housewives of New Jersey. Ranting and raving are now Stanger’s calling card. You have to love Reality TV. Or not.

Patti charges men $25k+ a year and female “millionairesses” $55k for 28 months of unlimited introductions.

Evidently, female clients take longer to match? Aw, come on….

A quick poll at a San Francisco Pilates studio, a nail salon and around a water cooler determined:  28 months of working with the shrill and tactless Stanger would be 26 months too long.

Perhaps there are better people to check out. Local Matchmakers can charge $3,000 to $100,000, depending on their exclusivity, the number of matches and just how many dates they promise. I don’t know if two dates a month for a $3,000 is cost-effective, realistic, or a rip-off.

They say there are thousands of singles using hundreds of matchmakers.

The three most popular that you hear about are: eLove, It’s Just Lunch, the Millionaire’s Club.  (See Yelp and Reviews)

You do the math:

One Los Angeles-based matchmaking service charges $2,500 to $25,000 annually –  for an average of 2.2 introductions per month.

Two “introductions” x 12 months = 24 introductions…go figure.

SEE: Matchmaker- Tell Me the Truth

Men are like fine wine

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This was sent to Page Larkin

by Evelyn J.  age 88

A Real Man

A real man is a woman’s best friend. He will never stand her up and never let her down.

He will reassure her when she feels insecure and comfort her after a bad day.

He will inspire her to do things she never thought she could do; to live without fear and forget regret.

He will enable her to express her deepest emotions and give in to her most intimate desires.

Bronze buddah in the parkHe will make sure she always feels as though she’s the most beautiful woman in the room

and will enable her to be her most confident, sexy, seductive, and invincible self.

Hearts on a line

No, wait!  I’m sorry…I’m thinking of wine.

Never mind.

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Page Larkin, San Francisco author, dating coach and dating docent

offers a Three-hour Dating Mojo workshop every month.

“Online Dating: Get Your Mojo Moving” in San Francisco

 Saturdays  TBA 10 AM to 1 PM

 

  • Cost: $49
  • Limit: eight to a class
  • Bring your current online dating profile, photos and a Dream Date List (Additional  Information with Enrollment) an open-mind, a sense of humor, and a desire to get in the dating game to play and win.

Enroll at Page.Larkin@gmail.com *photo_11785_20090615peacock*******//******

Here are 5 Easy Ways to get  ‘Back in the Dating Saddle’ and ride off into sunset 

  1. You’re not alone. There are 20+ million singles back in the dating game. Like you, many singles are bored playing Solitaire and are ready to play a rousing game of Hearts. Get out of the house and join a walking, hiking, biking, rowing, kayaking, birding, debate, tennis, ping-pong, or spelunking club. See Meetup.com for hundreds of organizations in your zip code.
  2. Adopt and embrace the C’est la vie Attitude. You know, life is short and why waste time? Refrain from perching over a phone waiting for it to ring or checking text/emails 10 times a day. Your mother was right: “Go outside and play.” It’s up to you – perform the ‘due diligence’ and find out where the action is (See: Top Ten Places to Meet Men and Women in Marin and SF)
  3. Be Brave.  So you are ready to start dating again? Want to get back in the saddle? There will always be a Greek chorus of friends and family urging you to get back on the horse.  If you have images of a sweet pony- ride dancing in your head, be prepared. The recent foray in dating is more like the electronic bull you remember from that John Travolta movie, Urban Cowboy.  Best advice: “Better buckle up. It’s going to be a bumpy ride.”  Get in the game and enjoy the new adventures in the unique and novel: Suddenly Single Date World
  4. Volunteer Check out sporting events, wines tastings, the Presidio, Litquake or theMill Valley Film Festival Festival- all are worthwhile and fun. See San Francisco’s two very popular organizations- St Anthony’ and Onebrick opportunities. Check Craigslist for volunteer listings – do a good deed and meet new people. Volunteers are love in motion..
  5. Your Mother was wrong: Do talk to strangers. Everyday. It’s okay, and heartily recommended that you look them in the eye, smile and say “hi” to five strangers – every single day.” Have fun in the New Year. Start now.

It’s a well-known fact: Dating at 50 is a lot more fun than dating at 20.

Think about it: you are more interesting, smarter, sexier and have way better life’s stories. And, you don’t have to ask your mom to borrow the car.

Come on in, the water is delicious.

Free Range Stock Summer is Oover Tubes
FACT: Women Love Men Who Dance

It’s not a secret: from the Dogpatch to Daly City, the Marina to Mission Street: women all heartily agreed:

Men who dance are a lot more fun and a lot more interesting.

The Take Away: Gentlemen start your lessons. Take beginner dance lessons, have fun and practice, practice, practice.

Three Local Hot Spots for dancing

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Go out in the world and work like money doesn’t matter,

Sing as if no one is listening, 

Love as if you have never been hurt, 

and Dance as if no one is watching”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

sad man

 A fear of dating?

Now is the Time to curb your “Fear of Dating”

What are you afraid of, Binkie?

So what if you are: Fresh out-of-the-box, Right off the shelf, and new to the dating game?

There are a lot of metaphors for people who are just back in the dating game. Sometimes getting back into the swing of dating can be daunting. If you have been out of the game for a while, you may notice dating today is a little more complex than it was a decade ago.

Not only is the playing field no longer level, the rules have changed, the game is faster and the uniforms are a lot shorter. The days of courting and being coy are as out dated as hot pants and polyester. Afraid to make a move? There are tons of fears, frights, scares and trepidations. There are even dating phobias which are irrational, intense, persistent fear of certain nouns (persons, places, things). For your information:

The Top Ten Common Fears Known to Single Men and Women

1. Isolophobia – fear of being alone

2. Athazagoraphobia- fear of being forgotten

3. Gamophobia – fear of marriage

4. Mageirocophobia – fear of cooking

5. Sexophobia – fear of the opposite sex

6. Gynophobia – fear of women

7. Hominophobia -fear of men

8. Clinophobia – fear of going to bed

9. Homilophobia – fear of sermons

10. Nyctophobia- fear of the dark or night.

Franklin D Roosevelt said it best:

“ The only thing we have to fear is fear itself – nameless, unreasoning, unjustified, terror which paralyzes needed efforts…”

Handpainted peace sign in dripping colors

Smart Women – Dumb Choices?


Best ADVICE:  Hide your IQ  and 
Show your bra strap…

Hey, smarty pants!

The University of Chicago describes itself  as The place fun came to die.”

September, 1980, 24 freshmen girls sat around two large oak tables while the dorm RA, Barbara, reviewed the rules: curfew, visiting hours, and security.After her 30-minute orientation, she closed the three-ring binder, looked up and said, “That’s it. Welcome to the University of Chicago. Off the record, I’ve got one other piece of advice.  My freshmen RA told me this and I am passing on to you.  In case you’re interested in dating a guy in college: hide your IQ and show your bra strap.”

The girls had all pretended to listen to the rules and regulation part of the presentation, however when Barbara, the cool upper classman – an Amazon, with long flaxen hair, the embroidered peasant blouse, faded jeans, and cool hecho en Mexico- huaraches mentioned the words “date and men” all 24 pairs of eyes were on her.  Enrapt.

“Yeah, hide your IQ. Hey, we were all 4.0, we all had the highest SAT scores, and you were probably all student body presidents, right? And, how many of you were cheerleaders or prom queens?” The girl from Nevada raised her hand, and put it down quickly. Barbara smiled at the poor little sheep that had lost their way and quipped, “I rest my case.”

Their new idol, now seemingly smarter and sexier than an hour before, picked up her binder, scanned the room and said, “Men are intimidated by smart women. Even here. It’s a fact. I am a junior, I have been here for three long years.”

“Finally, never knock on my door before 9 am or after 9 pm.” Her back was to us as she walked out of the room and called out, “Enjoy college, girls”

Lingering in Lingerie

The sage advice caused an eruption of discussion and Ms Nevada said she came to Chicago to meet ‘the Susan Sontags and Mike Nichols not the Carl Sagan and Milton Friedman types.’ The girls were initially bemused and confused. Twenty years before women burned bras and now – show and tell? Cool.

Do smart women intimidate men?

There is a Mensa party every Wednesday night in San Rafael (disguised as Trivia Night at the Broken Drum) Chances are most attendees at Trivia Night graduated from Ivy League schools. You see a lot of Penn, Cal, Stanford, and MIT logos on Wednesday nights. The trivia-teams compete furiously and the questions become more and more challenging as the evening transpires. Interestingly enough, 50% of the attendees are women. Really smart women. They show and tell. The word on the street is that the women succeed at scoring – on every level…academically and socially, IQ’s in full view.

And the men enjoy the exchange and banter.

The well-intentioned advice from a 20 year old in Chicago in 1980 inspired a spate of lingerie shopping for a dozen very smart coeds and the men on campus were luckier for it.

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“All this pitting of sex against sex, of quality against quality;  

all this claiming of superiority and imputing of inferiority

belong to the private-school stage of human existence where there are sides, 

and it is necessary for one side to beat another side.”

Virginia Woolf

 

 San Francisco Dating@50 Examiner, Page Larkin,welcomes your feedback, questions and queries at Page.Larkin@gmail.com.

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Sweet Revenge turns sour?

Merriane was very angry that Matt gave her the,

“You are too good for me” line.

They had been dating – hot and heavy- for three months and she was sure he was “The One.” They got along famously in every room of the house. He could cook, clean, shop, do laundry and did his best work in the bedroom. She had no complaints. And no clue.

She laughed when she told her girlfriends she would revel in  a weekend of Chick Flicks and enjoy a lavish Menage a Trois – with Ben and Jerry. They knew she wasn’t kidding, The company had just introduced four new flavors: Truffle Kerfuffle, Urban Bourbon, Candy Bar Pie and Half Baked. She claimed it was Chocolate Therapy.

Merriane  thought she paper the neighborhood with Matt UNwanted posters. Or she might do a ‘Blog a Bitch’  about her ex-boyfriend. She decided upon a thinly veiled account: Dirty little secrets – his worst fears,  awful things he said about his friends and family.  Next,  she would take anything he left behind and begin auctioning it off on eBay or put it on the street with a “free “sign on it.

On a sugar high, she started her movie marathon with Thelma and Louise, Beaches, Mystic Pizza, and Four Weddings and a Funeral.

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“I Will Survive” by Gloria Gaynor was her Mantra and her top song of the day –

followed closely by “Cry Me a River, “These Boots Are Made for Walking”  and,  You’re So Vain.

All it took was a couple of pints, a movie marathon, huge success on eBay, Break up songs blaring through the house, a good night’s sleep and the pity party was over.

Merriane knew she was alone,  

but more importantly, she was now available.

Like Mary Tyler Moore throwing her hat in the air – she was back in the game.

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Paper

Where are all the guys?

Inspired by the Invitation: Tini, Melanie, Helen, Mary and Dixie put on thier party dresses and heels and headed to the Singles Party in Marin County at the hotel.

 The Senior Singles Party promotion promised a rousing  50/50 Male and Female Mix

As the women entered the hotel, they saw dozens of women – all dressed up and ready to party – a large registration area and bouquets of red, heart-shaped  balloons. There was not a man to be seen. Checking watches, they concluded they were not too early and wondered about the male component.

Minutes later, four men strangled in – a sea of Tommy Bahama shirts and kakhi pants. The appeared to know the organizers and put on their name tags and smiles. Then they mingled. Shills or Singles?

30 Single Women showed up that Sunday afternoon and only a Dozen Men.             The ladies were entertained by the more aggressive femme fatales who went after the men like there was no tomorrow. There were no cat fights…however, there was some jockeying for position and Trump-like pushes to the front of the line.

Not amused, not happy: The five ladies insisted upon refunds on the spot and wandered over to the San Rafael Civic Center Farmer’s Market where, every Sunday is party.

Page Larkin Consults: We met for a two-hour session on “Men and Dating at 50, 60, and 70?”

In additon to candor, there was much laughter and a swell of renewed interest in Meeting a Few Good Men.

They are on the look out…stay tuned for results.

cupid

 

All names have been changed to protect the Suddenly Single.

 

Revelation

Like jumping on a treadmill at full speed?


Welcome to your new role as Suddenly Single; ready to enter Dating World 2017?

You will gradually discover The Rites and the Wrongs of The Mating Game. Take heed. Research indicates there are two smart ways to look at the initial stages of the Dating Game:

1. Try the Rose Colored Glasses Technique – one rife with optimism and a healthy dose of denial – both considered keen coping devices.

2. Or, another popular system, most oft used by the strong of heart is the Cold Shower of Reality Technique.

The Rose Colored Glasses Technique  involves a Head Down, Heart Up, Gung Ho attitude where caution is thrown to the wind and you are wide open to new experiences – free from skepticism and negativity. You view DATING 2017 be like boarding a streetcar – knowing full well another will always come along…

Cold Shower is less forgiving and a lot more direct. There are no streetcar metaphors – more jumping on speeding Treadmill symbols come into play.

What are you up for?

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Tell me your story: page.larkin@gmail.com 

Denial

Where are all the single men in SF?



Donde esta los muchachos?

Dear Page Larkin

I went to the movie Friday afternoon and the room was filled with women. No, it wasn’t a chick flick. It was Moonlight Then, I went to a Pinot Noir wine tasting at Whole Foods. We were 75% single women and 25% couples.

Rick’s Wine Bar looks like a sorority party. I just can’t bring myself to attend NASCAR or those cigar bars.

Where are all the boys?  Then, I went to a trendy, cool, church…nope, all gray-haired ladies – pretty much.

On Sunday, like all good American girls, I went to Bed Bath and Beyond  – it was like a wedding shower- the aisles were filled with women, girls, ladies, shopping for linens and things.


Is it me, or is it San Francisco? This is like living in the world of the Amazons.

By mistake, I went to Union Street.  Once upon a time, a long time ago …Really popular Singles Bars used to be the rage. That night,  It was Frat Boy Night packed with 20 to 30-year-old, drunk, Frat boys high-fiving one another and measuring virility/maturity by the number of sake bombs they were throwing back. Next!

Where are the big boys?

Finally, I LYFTED over to Valencia Street- and was inundated with couples going to all the trendy- fabulous-darling restaurants. The Good Vibrations emporium was teeming with women, go figure.

Where did all the single guys go?

From Fresno to Frisco and Frustrated

 

Dear From Fresno to Frisco…

Brava! You have certainly done due diligence and you make keen observations.Remember: A guy has got to eat – linger in the aisles at Safeway, Trader Joe’s, Whole Foods, and Rainbow  Grocery-you get the idea. Smile. Say “hey.” Frequently.

Many happy women say they met many happy men at the Golden State Warrior and SF Giants games – the perfect recipe for meeting people of the opposite sex: winning teams, sky high excitement, mutual passion for Pence, Posey, Pagan….Curry, Klay….

You’re right, guys are not in bookstores, yoga classes, or cake decorating classes – they should be – that’s where women go.

 

Tip of the day: See Top 10 Places Meet Men 

 

Breakfast

“There is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.”

Steven Wright

 

 

 

Matchmaker, matchmaker! Tell me the truth

5rhl-ksrydq-dino-reichmuth-2Once upon a time, in that quaint, little village nestled in the mountains –

you had to consult with a Matchmaker to score a date and a mate.

Mae West once said, “A hard man is good to find.”

Aeons ago, any man was good to find. Today, we have a plethora of possibilities:  the Top Ten Online Dating companies  (Note: most are owned by the same company)

However, there are a passel of so-called Matchmakers lurking in the shadows- seeking out Mr Lonely and Just Widowed –

aka ripe for the picking.

bad photos12A quick look at Yelp reviews for so-called Matchmakers/Sonoma/Sacramento/San Francisco divulges sad stories.

“I naively went through theTEN coaching sessions paying close to $2000, and then she did NOTHING. once I was allowed  to “enter her inner dating circle”.  She basically took the money and ran!  I reached out twice very politely asking what was going on, and both times I got a run around about her life issues and how they were hindering her professional life. Whoa- then give me my $2000 back! … an unbelievable and expensive rip off/ let down.”

“Ms Romance wanted me to go through a 10-session dating coaching/therapy program before she would determine whether she would accept me into her roster of matchable. Ha!”

“This business is a total rip off, they are fake.  Stay away!  My first , in person interview lasted almost three hours at their Santa Rosa office.  I am an attractive , intelligent, senior woman; I was told they had plenty of compatible men to introduce me to. The sales woman asked me many personal questions about my life style.”

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And so, boys and girls – before Handing over the $3,ooo – $6,000 (for men)

Tell all your friends and relatives you are ready to date. Start looking up and around. Start smiling at other people. Look at Meetup.com , Read Johnny FunCheap, join the Sierra Club; sign up for salsa or swing dance lessons; go to San Francisco Giants Games…got off the couch, and out of the house, Today.

Always Research any and all dating companies. Avoid the charlatans parading as experts.75

You are welcome.

A Good Match

The Herd Mentality…

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The Yoga Babes had been friends for a decade.

On weekends, the single ladies often went, en masse, to events, movies, performances around the City. They were of an age where Eileen Fisher was more their go to designer…Rachel Zoe, Badgley Mischka and Trina Turk were no longer in their hot fashion repertoire.

It took awhile…

One Saturday evening, the  ladies were lined up to see Paula West see at the Hotel Nikko, Tamsin looked at the gang of girls and said, “Oh, my god! Don’t look now. We are all wearing the same thing!”  The ladies laughed and looked.

Everyone was wearing an ensemble comprised solely of black and white.  One in a black Tuxedo jacket, white cashmere Turtleneck and  black slacks. Tamsin was clad in all-white with a dramatic black shawl. There were lots of black pants; cigarette, flowing, parachute, jeweled Capris, trousers.

It takes a village…a herd…

The women looked, laughed and said, “Devil may care – we don’t!”  As a rule, the women migrate to the same color palette. C’est la vie.

WOMEN IN LITTLE BLACK DRESSES

Fashion is about dressing according to what’s fashionable. Style is more about being yourself.        

Oscar de la Renta

Heard

Quitting a dating site? Clean up your act

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Darn! You thought you deleted your online dating photos.

And, bam! Three months later, Yahoo has your photo scrolling on their home page in a Match.com promotion: “Looking for Single Men in San Francisco?”

You thought you went through the necessary channels to quit once and for all. Match sent you the canned “Really? Are you sure you want to leave the party? Trixie, Tiffani, and Binkie will miss you.”

You push, “Cancel Account” and you think the party is over.

Not so fast, Dude.

For six more weeks, Match, Seniors, Our Time can run your photograph – making their inventory of Single men and women look full and diverse. And, who knew, you might see your old photo floating on the Yahoo home page. (Yahoo – desperate times – desperate measures?)

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Page Larkin’s Top Three Tips to Quit an Online Dating Site – aka Leave no Trace

#1. Delete all your photos. One by one. You don’t want your photo floating in their ads or hanging around for God and everyone to see…

#2. Copy and Paste everything you have written to a Word Doc. You might, someday, want to sign up for another site and use the pithy prose you produced, again.

#3. Finally, delete every single word you wrote on your profile. If a site, like Match, insists that you have 500 characters in any mini-essay, copy and paste in The Pledge of Allegiance or Dave Barry’s definition of “What Women Want” or the opening to Kafka’s, The Trial.

As a precautionary measure, change your age, gender, and height- the more ludicrous the better.

C’est fini! Leave no trace and your slate will be clean.

Cue: Fireworks

Cue: Fireworks

It is not in the stars to hold our destiny but in ourselves.
William Shakespeare

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