Suddenly Single… Minded

Welcome to the Wild and Whimsical World of Internet Dating

I met John Miller on Millionaire

photo_21517_20120317-2I met ‘John Miller’ on Millionaire

Years ago, I joined MillionaireMatch when friends encouraged me to take a risk. They thought it would be hysterical to try this site. It was.

I posted the requisite three photos, listed my likes and filled out the silly questionnaire and sat back and waited for floods of moneymakers to show up.

Rather than a flood, I had a trickle of flirtations.

The first man to contact me was, John Miller, a real New Yorker. He had that brusque, Bronxy, braggadocio style.

His first e-mail to me was “Hey! Baby!”

I failed to be impressed and deleted it. A day later, John Miller wrote again, this time he used words and indicated he was in Public Relations was “tremendously well off financially” and also worked in real estate.

Curious, I asked him about his experience with online dating.

He wrote that he didn’t really need dates. He said actresses and movie stars were often after him and he’d been ‘doing very well in every way’ since getting divorced, months earlier.

I then asked about his friends and he bragged that the “radio star” Howard Stern was a good friend. Ugh.

Interestingly enough, he never once he asked me a single question.

He was quite forthcoming with information and said he never dated a woman who was “a dog or a slob.” He also offered that he ‘greatly respected women.’ Really?

In a very weak moment, I agreed to speak with him on the phone.

He spoke the same way he wrote… that New York cadence – however, he was more cocky and arrogant than I ever anticipated.

John Miller  said he dated a parade of models but he thought that a California girl with a couple of degrees from those big West Coast schools would be impressive. I mentioned I was very busy working on a large project, hiring a team of executives. He said he’d be perfect for the job- any job- he was that talented.

He wanted to fly me out to the East Coast so we could get to know one another better.

Not only was I hesitant, I was disinterested. In no time, he dropped down into classic crude and lewd references. Next!

As I said goodbye to John Miller, he protested and asked if didn’t want to hire him to be one of my executives. Lewd references followed.

Hire him?

You’re fired!11695761_1027617460584183_145854481130328541_n




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2 thoughts on “I met John Miller on Millionaire

  1. Nicely done and very funny!

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