Dating: Eharmony- like a kayak or the Titanic?
Cyndi moved to San Francisco and jumped on the EHarmony boat expecting a Crystal Cruise experience, replete with fascinating men, sparkling conversations, interesting destinations and a whole lot of fun.
She navigated through the rough waters of the horribly long application of questions, quizzes, and essays. Two hours later, she was ready to sail into the sunset with one of the 15,000 people who fill out the infamous Eharmony questionnaire every day.
After she paid the boarding fee of $60 – a slow dribble of so-called ‘Matches’ appeared in her mailbox.
Like a kid on Christmas morning, she metaphorically ripped off the trappings of trivia: she scanned photos, checked for geographic closeness, education, marital status and interests. That first morning she came up with lumps of coal.
Abandon Hope All Ye Who Eharmonize?
She thought a man who paraded his ‘Career and Harvard Law’ in the first sentence smacked of insecurity. She preferred a man with some religion – no Bible thumping; no Tea Party boys need apply. She was not interested in any Newts; Jerry Springer or Howard Stern types. The only Mitts she liked were worn by the SF Giants.
The guy who threw caution to the wind and wrote lurid porn-poetry proved Sartre was right, “Hell is other people.”
Although she was ready to jump ship, Cyndi decided to give EHarmony one month of her time. Dreams of ping-pong, shuffleboard, mai tais at sunset, walking hand-in-hand pervaded. She wasn’t the type to participate in Wet T-Shirt or belly-flop pool contests.
Like the Titanic, “…too much brag and not enough seaworthy construction…” Eharmony had promised romance and smooth sailing. Both failed.
Dull times three
Patiently, she watched as, day by day, EH sent one or two so-called ‘Perfect Matches.’ Seriously?
The process was so slow, hit a lot of obstacles and left Cyndi feeling like she was out in the cold. By the end of the disappointing experience she decided to leave the singles cruise on EHarmony, and go ashore, and stay there.
Internet Dating Sites are a dime a dozen – some reputable- others- not so much.
Here is a sampling of sites for your dating database:
Oh, ye of a little faith:
- Jdate.com (for Jewish singles),now: Jswipe.com
- christianmingle.com (for those dedicated to Christianity),
- spiritualsingles.com (for no particular denomination).
Mid-life Sites – 50 and up- in addition to Match.com
Tawdry and tacky:
- Ashleymadison.com (Promotes cheating on your mate)
The Questionable and Quirky niche:
- Datemypet.com (“Date me. Date my pet”),
- Theatlasphere.com (connecting Ayn Rand fans),
- soul2match.com (matches people who look alike).
Do you have a really bad “The Worst First Date?” nightmare or fiasco?
Tell me about it.