Single women: there are only two kinds?
I met a man today who told me his secret about single women.
We were both attending a presentation about Financial Solutions in a Time of Chaos.
It was dry, boring, and depressing. At the morning break, we walked out together – both shaking our heads. I sighed audibly. He laughed and said, “Pretty grim, huh?” He asked if I’d like to join him for a cup of coffee.
In no time, we skipped the dour/ dire topic of finance and we were discussing our social lives. The theme turned into: yours, mine and ours. Oddly enough, we had several similar Internet dating experiences.
John D, is of an age – over 70, tan, well-dressed, interesting, and a good conversationalist (i.e. he asked questions.) He claimed he had done a lifetime of insightful “Relationship Research.” His revelation: there are only two kinds of single women in the world.
Only two? Really? Was he cynical, calloused or correct?
A retired Fortune 500 exec, he has lived all over the world, been divorced twice, has a Nob Hill condo and a house in the wine country. He regaled me with entertaining stories about his extensive (and very expensive) decades of dating experiences.
Concluding that the two categories of Single women are
A. The First Woman is Too Involved.
She has many friends, varied interests (enrolled in classes, takes numerous trips, belongs to a few clubs, involved in favorite charities and volunteers.) First Woman is always going someplace and is doing something.
Therefore, she has no time for a Real Relationship.
B. The Second Woman has Obligations
She either has teenagers/kids living at home or elderly parents and must attend to one or both. And, that it is virtually impossible to date a woman with teenagers.
That was it – his complete dating scenario analysis neatly tied up with a black ribbon of defeatism. Sad.
Who could I introduce him to that didn’t fit that description? I have an address book filled with the names of single female friends who are the exception to his myopic ‘Romance Research.’
The Finale: Cat Woman
Then, John D. had to tell me about the very attractive, 60-something woman, with gorgeous, silver hair who he recently met. She revealed she loved Argentine Tango lessons and being in the arms of a man for an hour and a half. Afterwards, she blissfully returned home to the sanity and simplicity of her cat. That was all she needed a monthly “90-minute fix.”
He commented he had repeatedly met her “type.”He called it the Alone Together Syndrome. That was lost on me
Coffee turned into lunch and I gave him “My List of The Top Ten Places to Meet Women In San Francisco.”
He agreed to give it a try, and would report back. And, I did get him to admit – there are more than two kinds of suddenly single,women-round-50- in San Francisco.
“Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.”