Suddenly Single… Minded

Welcome to the Wild and Whimsical World of Internet Dating

BEST: Online Dating Travel Tips – Google ’em first

Molly was smitten.

She met ‘Romantic Ronnie’ online and they clicked immediately.

His photos,  flirting, and multiple photos of his new Porsche overshadowed the fact that he lived two time zones away. She said she loved his humor and his pictures. She shared many of his passions (Netflilx, Chocolate, Martinis and 600 count sheets) Truth be told:  she was ready for real romance. Molly had been in an out of sour relationships and was ready for fun, romance, and passion.

After a handful of emails, they spoke on the phone.

He was a big flirt, and he said, “Come to Atlanta, Sugar – I’ll show you the town.”

(Note: He didn’t say, “Let me buy you an airline ticket and I will graciously pay for your hotel room.”)
Her friends told her to slow down, to ask more questions, to Google the guy, get to know him – more than via text messages, emails and a few phone calls.

She Wanted to “Go the Distance”

She had tons of frequent flyer miles, her cousin lived outside of Atlanta, and she was confident that Ronnie was all that he claimed to be: single, a long distance runner, a CPA, a gourmet, and a Tulane graduate.

Molly’s expensive lesson is a lesson for one and all.

She threw caution to the wind and flew to Atlanta against all advice from friends and colleagues. Romantic Ronnie met her at the airport with flowers, which didn’t disguise the fact that he was much heavier than his photos; he drove his Ford truck (the Porsche was in the shop) and took her to TGIF for dinner.

He drank two Long Island Teas while she sipped a Diet Coke. Initially, Ronnie was a charming Southern gentleman, by the second drink he was a boor. His active flirting with the waitress was the crowning blow.  Molly excused herself and on the way to the ladies room, asked hostess to call a cab to take her to her hotel.

She graciously informed Ronnie that she was going to her hotel and she would call in the morning. He protested. He suggested she stay at his house. He wanted know the name of her hotel.  She kissed him on the cheek and left. The long, expensive cab ride to her hotel gave her plenty of time to dissect her experience with Ronnie. Her friends had been right. She had moved too fast and made an expensive mistake. She called her cousin and arranged to see her the following day. She would send a polite “Dear John” email to Ronnie and end that chapter.

Top Five Tips for Long Distance Dates

Long distance dates are rife with challenges. Be safe, be smart and plan ahead.

  • Always stay in a hotel. Can’t afford a hotel? Don’t go.
  • Never, ever stay in the other person’s home.
  • Upon Arrival: Take taxi /rental car to get to and from the airport. Never, ever get into a car with someone you’ve never met. Can you say Ted Bundy?
  • I’ve got a secret:  be sane: There is no reason to reveal the name of your hotel until you are 100% certain your date is a Boy Scout. (Trustworthy, loyal, honest…)
  • Keep Safe: It’s a date, not a fashion show. No jewelry required. Keep your valuables in the hotel safe. Or at home.

Tell All: On every first date  – in San Francisco –  or out of state –  be sure to advise several friends/family where you are going, staying, and the name and address of the person you are meeting. Yes, even coffee dates. Tell a friend.

Bundle of Dollars MoneyCan you Afford this Date?

You do the math: Round trip  plane ticket, taxi to and from hotel, meals, hotel charges, and misc charges. Then tabulate how much time are you willing to spend on a long distance romance?

Molly used to say all the good men in San Francisco were taken. She changed her mind before she landed at SFO. Lesson learned.


San Francisco Dating@50 Examiner, Page Larkin, welcomes your feedback, questions and queries.


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