Suddenly Single… Minded

Welcome to the Wild and Whimsical World of Internet Dating

Don’t you dare wink at me, buster! Rants for romance

Rants for Romance?

Singles  speak out

This week brings questions about winking, blinking and getting along. Send your “Single at 50” queries to


Dear Page,
I am 52, divorced for six years, and new to online dating. I did everything you said (posted a recent photo, wrote my profile, and enrolled in two different dating sites) and all I get are “winks.”

You said winks at the lowest form of communication, you’re right! Tell men everywhere women hate winks. Don’t send me a stupid icon without a single word – to me that means you can even write a sentence – it means I am just one of 30 women you’re casting about hoping to a hook a sucker.
My advice: just write one lousy sentence; there, I feel better!
Linda in Las Vegas

Dear Linda in Las Vegas,
Thanks for voicing the opinion of many of us. Every week, I get tweets, texts, and lengthy e-mails echoing your same sentiment. Point well taken.

See: Page Larkin’s That’s rude! Dating Etiquette
Peace and love, Page

Dear Page Larkin,
I met a wonderful guy on Eharmony two months ago. We exchanged e-mails for two weeks before he agreed to speak on the phone to confirm our coffee date. Before our date, I Googled him and found him to be “as advertised.” We met at the Ferry Building, walked around for an hour and took the Sausalito ferry.  We had lunch, split the bill; we walked and talked for two more hours and returned to SF. He kissed me goodbye and I never heard from him again.  I e-mailed him once, no response. Was it me?
Down and Out in Danville

Dear Down and out in Danville,
You failed to mention if there was chemistry, heat, or mutual attraction. Manners dictate that a person thank the other for the date – there is an unwritten “law” that – after a first date- two people make plans for future date or bow out, with a polite “It was nice meeting you, we are not at match.” Move on – it wasn’t meant to be.
Peace and love, Page

Hey, Larkin,
I sent out 25 e-mails on and not one woman responded.
My message was cute and flirty and I thought it was really good. What’s up with women today? Is everyone stuck up?
Ronnie in the Marina

Hey Ronnie in the Marina
Remember: spell check is your best friend. Take the time to write a message that is coherent, interesting, and logical. Sometimes our efforts to be clever and sarcastic can be misconstrued. Try, try again.
Peace and love, Page

Dear Page,
My feelings are hurt. I enthusiastically signed up for the seven-day free trial. No one writes back to me!  I am a Georgia peach: 56, 5’6. athletic, smart, cute and fun. I sent out 30 “winks” to all the cutest guys within 50-miles of Atlanta. Not one man responded. Help!
Ashley at Tara

Dear Ashley at Tara,
Good for you for getting out there and trying.
Let’s recalibrate: erase all thoughts of “winking” at men. (See above) It’s a lost cause looked down upon by thousands.
First, create a short introduction linking you to an attractive man:  “I enjoyed reading your profile; especially the comment about… We both like… Please read my profile and if anything resonates, please get back to me. Thanks.
Try that approach –  as opposed to winking.  Wait and see- how it works, do  get back to me and report.  Read : How Rude!     Good luck, Page



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