Suddenly Single… Minded

Welcome to the Wild and Whimsical World of Internet Dating

Dating 101: Should a woman call a man?

 iLITTLE BALCKBart is a classic bon vivant. 

He recently renewed his membership in the Singles World after two, failed marriages (to the same woman, in a different body.)  We have been friends since college and he is my “Go To Guy”- when it comes to understanding the male point of view.

Bart talks to his golf buddies, his yoga dudes, and his men’s group: the Manly Men, who go into the woods for drumming and chanting…camraderie, touch football, bonfires, skits, laughter and fun.  

Men talk about three things:

Bart told me his groups of friends usually default to the same three topics each time they get together.

Consistently,  Topic #1 Sports,  followed by  #2. Wine  and then the conversation lapses into talking about

#3. Women,  (wives, ex-wives, dates, ex-dates and the Internet online dating scene) …usually, in that order.

Bart came up with the term for his 60-year old pals were dating 30-year-old gals…

guys are not called cougars but, they are called: Grand Paws.

Who calls Whom?

A recent Bikrim-hot discussion with the Yoga Babes was all about “Dating at 50.”

What was  the current protocol about calling a man or texting him versus merely waiting by the phone?

 Is it proper for a woman to call a man?

The Yoga Babes (nine women, 50% single and 50-ish) were divided. Some thought men were ‘Hunters’ and women had to wait for the phone call, while others subscribed to the carpe diem theory, why stand on antiquated protocol? Why not pick up the phone and say”Hey?”

Bart said  men are flattered by the attention of a phone call from a woman, however, it is deeply ingrained in their DNA, no matter how charming and flirtatious an initial phone call, it might be construed as aggressive. Really? Can you spell antediluvian? Bart, Bart, Bart, wake up and smell the Peet’s.

 Wrong number. What kind of guy is intimidated by or freaked out by a phone call?

A followup random poll taken at  three San Francisco hot spots – Swank,  the Slanted Door and Original Joe’s – came up with a resounding, “Yes! Tell women to call the guy. We love it!”

There you have it. 


(Dear Bart is not a Neanderthal – he is pretty evolved in most matters – however, he is total “old school” when it
comes the 1930’s Emily Post etiquette)
And, majority rules. If you are thinking about calling a man – to say, ” Hi,”  or to ask him if he wants to go for a walk, a hike, for a cup of coffee,  – Carpe diem, darlin. Why wait?

What do you think? Shoot me a comment…


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