Dating a bombe, a souffle… or a duff? Prefer sweet things?
They get together once a week at the Champagne Bakery and weigh in on dating.
The women discuss dating decorum and delusions as well as romance rites and wrongs. Lofty subjects include: how many calories in a sweet nothing? Are there twice as many calories in a double entendre? Who pays on the second date? Is it polite to refer a date, who didn’t quite work out- to a friend? Do you tweet, text or talk?
Talking in Code?
The sumptuous atmosphere of the bakery has inspired a shorthand to describe dating bombes, trifles and the much sought after: angel food. A ‘napoleon’ is someone who is sweet, yet has shortcomings; a ‘sponge cake’, is one who tries to borrow money, a ‘pound cake’ is someone who is dull and heavy. A person who is ‘a soufflé has no substance. Crullers and duffs and fools are not in their sweet dating repertoire.
Required reading this month is Greg Behrendt’s “He’s Just Not That Into You” a hard-hitting, no-nonsense book they regard as their ‘bible’.
As far as Role models, the group subscribes to the sage observations of Mother Teresa. And, naturally, Mae West.
Mother Teresa said: “If we want a love message to be heard, it has got to be sent out. To keep a lamp burning, we have to keep putting oil in it.”
Mae West said: “Too much of a good thing can be wonderful.”
Date Watchers appear default to a more ‘West-ern’ philosophy.
There are about a dozen women, at any given meeting, and it appears they fall into three distinct categories. Roughly one third of the women have put their big toe into the Internet dating pool.They report they are happy with just a short, sweet introduction.
The others have dived into the deep end of dating: hearts first. They are the true storytellers. And, boy, do they tell stories!
Thr third faction is made up of true date-watchers… they live vicariously through the stories – of their daring dating sisters.
Next week, four of the women have agreed to do Canon Balls into the deep end of the sparkling dating pool and sign up on Match.com.
“It is better to be looked over than overlooked” Mae West
They don’t have CCR’s – however, they have a dating code of ethics based on the Golden Rule.
Some of their beliefs are predicated on the philosophy of Socrates and Camus: happiness is fleeting kind of an idea. Meanwhile, the Date Watchers sit amidst glass cases filled with divinity and ambrosia and debate the choice of upside down cake versus wedding cake.
How sweet it is.
Page Larkin San Francisco Examiner at 50